True Story From an Anonymous Contributor #6
Because of my lifelong history of being painfully affected by the choices of men who used pornography, it had become one of my standard dating questions. After about a month, when things were starting to get serious, I would ask the guy, “So what’s your take on pornography?” or something along those lines. But when I asked this guy, this time, I didn’t think there was any chance that he would say he used it. He was so happy, outgoing, friendly. He didn’t have any of the depressive tendencies, disrespect for women or lingering, leering eyes that I had come to notice as telltale signs. He just seemed so… clean. So trustworthy.
So you can imagine my shock and dismay when he honestly related to me the struggle with pornography that he had dealt with for years. I heard his voice crack with emotion as he admitted to me that it was the heaviest burden of his life, his greatest shame.
My emotions were torn between compassion, fear, disgust and a desire to help. I was silent for a long time. But after the abuse I had seen, the pain I had endured, the separation, the lies, all caused by pornography, I just didn’t think I could handle another relationship with the weight of an addiction hanging over it.